Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Nostalgia

It comes in waves. All of the sudden, I miss everyone. One day you’re 17 and graduating high school. The nerves and excitement are unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. You get sentimental and swear to your high school friends that you’ll keep in touch and be friends forever. Then you blink. You’re 21 and about to graduate college, and you swear that your nerves and emotions have never been so raw. You’re excited and scared, deeply emotional and impossibly nostalgic. You’ve got the whole world at your fingertips. Then you blink. You’re 23 and you don’t know where the time went. You swear you were just 17, 21. You remember being so vulnerable and raw and you actually find yourself missing it. Because now you feel numb and old and constantly nostalgic for the days when you felt like you could set the world on fire. I know your 20’s are supposed to be free and exciting. It’s a time to feel and see and do as much as you can. As a 20 something you’re in the prime of your life. Life is full of possibilities and people are curious as to what you have to offer the world. It won’t always be this way. In fact, right now is the youngest you’ll ever be again. So what happens when you’re 23 and all you can feel is longing and nostalgia? Why can’t I live in the moment and enjoy the right now instead of constantly looking back? One day I will look at this time in my life with longing and wish I could be 23 again. So why do I enjoy moments more once they’ve passed? Why can’t I enjoy the moment as it is happening? I need to learn to enjoy the here and now, because it won’t be here for long.

"We spend time building something up and then we don't enjoy it. We sit there terrified someone's gonna take it away from us."

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