Monday, December 3, 2012

Something More...

So sometimes I get this feeling, and I don’t know how to clearly describe it, but I’m going to do my best.
Do you ever get the feeling that you’re bigger than your life? That you’re meant for something more? Something bigger? Something not so ordinary? I get this feeling kind of a lot. The feeling that I’m supposed to be doing something bigger with my life. I wish I knew exactly what it was, but I don’t. I just know that growing up, things would happen in my life and I would tell my dad, “oh, this is going to be part of my E! True Hollywood Story one day”. I don’t necessarily care about the fame or the money. I just want to fulfill whatever it is I’m supposed to be doing with my life. It sometimes feels like something inside of me is just missing; like I’m not doing something that I should be doing. I asked my mom if she ever felt like this and to my surprise she said no. She claimed that having a child and working is exactly what she felt like she was supposed to be doing. This may sound conceded, but I really do feel like I was made for a life much bigger than that; a path less ordinary. Sometimes I wonder if that's why moving forward in time scares me so much. Because I'm getting older and still haven't found the cause of the feeling yet. Who knows.
Since I can’t exactly place my finger on this feeling, my plan is to continue on in nursing school, and hopefully, one day, an opportunity will come up; an opportunity to be a part of something much bigger than myself. And maybe then I’ll be ready, and I’ll know exactly what it is I’m meant to be doing.

 

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